Yes, I agree that if ‘cis’ or ‘cisgender’ is used in an intentionally derogatory way, it is offensive, but then so is any other word used in such a matter. I also agree that just being cisgender shouldn’t be looked down upon by someone as a bad thing. Most people are ‘cis’ or ‘not trans.’ That shouldn’t be a reflection on their character any more than being trans should be a reflection on our character.

However, I’ve made posts where I’m merely using cisgender as a way to differentiate between people who are and are not trans, and I still get comments from people telling me to stop being so offensive and calling them ‘cisgender,’ even when I didn’t say a single thing derogatory against people who aren’t trans.

Also, I think trans people are judged a little too unfairly when it comes to conforming to stereotypes. Yes, we do try to dress/act based on gender stereotypes, but that’s because if we don’t, we get misgendered. That is something we’re very much trying to avoid. Honestly, I’d love to still wear make-up and paint my nails, but as soon as I do, I get misgendered and people come out of the woodworks accusing me of not really being trans and a whole lot of other bullshit.

There are days I feel equipped to handle it and those are the days I do buck gender norms and paint my nails. However, there are days when I want to fly under the radar and just get on with my day. I can’t carry the torch against gender stereotypes all the time. I just don’t have the energy for it.

I hope that makes some sense?

Transgender writer and author. I primarily write on LGBTQ issues, with a focus on the transgender community.

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